Comments on: When the dead are not present in body http://boyinthebands.com/archives/when-the-dead-are-not-present-in-body/ Scott Wells on the practice of Christian faith Tue, 02 Dec 2008 20:53:18 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.5 By: Boy in the bands » Blog Archive » Without the body: the catafalque http://boyinthebands.com/archives/when-the-dead-are-not-present-in-body/#comment-23358 Boy in the bands » Blog Archive » Without the body: the catafalque Sun, 28 May 2006 14:26:19 +0000 http://www.universalistchurch.net/boyinthebands/archives/when-the-dead-are-not-present-in-body/#comment-23358 [...] Ages ago, I said I would work on some ideas for remembering the dead when no physical remains could be found. This weekend seems a good time to pick that back up, and let’s begin with the catafalque. [...] […] Ages ago, I said I would work on some ideas for remembering the dead when no physical remains could be found. This weekend seems a good time to pick that back up, and let’s begin with the catafalque. […]

]]> By: Peregrinato http://boyinthebands.com/archives/when-the-dead-are-not-present-in-body/#comment-10591 Peregrinato Mon, 02 May 2005 02:44:51 +0000 http://www.universalistchurch.net/boyinthebands/archives/when-the-dead-are-not-present-in-body/#comment-10591 Good call, Scott. One of the greatest needs in the resolution of grief is to fully (psychologically) accept the death. (This has little to do with the "Denial" malarky of Kubler Ross) Viewing a body--at a wake, or privately, or an open-casket funeral--is hardly macabre and helps facilitate this process. Bereavement comes from the root word that means to have something taken from you. Someone who has lost someone and has no body to mourn is doubly bereaved--their love has been taken from them, and the loss of a body feels like a double theft. Something else to think about with cremations or other means of disposing the body: people who want their ashes spread to the wind need to leave something behind. People have remarked that going to a "memorial stone" (rather than a tombstone) can seem empty. This is not to criticize the process of cremation, just to bring attention to one of its repercussions. I like your thinking. Good call, Scott. One of the greatest needs in the resolution of grief is to fully (psychologically) accept the death. (This has little to do with the “Denial” malarky of Kubler Ross) Viewing a body–at a wake, or privately, or an open-casket funeral–is hardly macabre and helps facilitate this process.

Bereavement comes from the root word that means to have something taken from you. Someone who has lost someone and has no body to mourn is doubly bereaved–their love has been taken from them, and the loss of a body feels like a double theft.

Something else to think about with cremations or other means of disposing the body: people who want their ashes spread to the wind need to leave something behind. People have remarked that going to a “memorial stone” (rather than a tombstone) can seem empty. This is not to criticize the process of cremation, just to bring attention to one of its repercussions.

I like your thinking.

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